Ahh Friday... No Tank Day For Me

And so it turned out that Lisa left me a text last night urging me to see some medical attention about my face. Basically she said "I need you not to die because I need help raising Johnnie". I'm paraphrasing but really that was the intent she communicated. Even while expressing concern for me it has to be about her. I'm shaking my head but that's just Lisa being Lisa. And that's ok. I reminded myself not to engage with lower dimensional behavior. But I also reminded myself that what I did bugging out as quickly as I did WAS lower dimensional behavior. And that I owed Lisa an explanation for it. So I called her this morning and told her that I was starting to feel overwhelmed which was the last thing that I needed. She was making me feel worse so I had to get away. But that I appreciated the concern very much. I also reassured her that this is already much better than it was 17 years ago, that no one dies from Bell's palsy, that I am not having a cardiac event, but that I probably triggered a virus attack of some kind AND/OR I'm under more stress than I think. My irregular resting heart rate and its spikes speak to that very clearly. What I think is that right now I'm extremely sensitive to stressors that normally I'd easily fend off but now they are really affecting me. And perhaps I triggered old, buried emotions that need to be processed and let go. How else can I explain a condition I last encountered 17 years ago? Anyway, Lisa and I made peace over the phone and she invited me to breakfast on Saturday. I had already bought her eggs and French brioche too and gave it to her last night. Saturday breakfast has become routine for us both anyway. And of course she had to update me on the latest trials and tribulations of her office since she had a Zoom  meeting with her doctors last night. It's ok. It's part of what you have to accept with Lisa.

In the meantime, I had my Team Meeting at 9 AM which I barely made on time. In fact, I got up so late I never did have time to take a shower. Heck I barely had enough time for breakfast. And so for the 2nd day in a row, I skipped my shower. After my team meeting I got caught up working actually. And when I looked up it was already almost noon. Already time for lunch. I wanted to meditate, I wanted to chill, I wanted to do some more forgiveness rituals, whatever I thought I needed to address that brought up the numbness in my face. And whatever I was doing I think actually helped. Funny thing about energy healing is that either you're all in or you're not. It is done unto you as you believe. And I choose to believe. But maybe I have to work on my other-than-conscious Self too. In the meantime, I did make it out a bit to walk around the neighborhood so that I'd at least make it past 1000 steps after lunchtime. I wanted to take a nap too come to think of it, but the FRB birthday Zoom meeting was at 2 PM, and then the 3 PM huddle right after that. Actually the FRB party turned to be pretty fun because we ended up doing Two Truths and A Lie AND we ended up doing a couple of puzzles too that we all participated in. Actually was pretty fun for a change. And very much light-hearted. It felt like a party after all. Very much unlike the Huddle which turned all serious but then it did get done right around 4:45. I didn't head out to the store to do grocery shopping immediately after like I used to do. I spent the rest of Friday lollygagging actually. Doing my steps, taking my time at Ralphs, and then making myself dinner (the ground lamb tagine thing) and watching a movie. Kind of a Close Encounters type of movie set in 1950s New Mexico. And was a pretty interesting watch too. My right eye was still pretty sore form not being able to blink as much so I let myself fall asleep on the couch to some relaxing music on YouTube. And that was Friday night :)