Lazy Day

Ahh Friday. I woke up this morning with the intention of keeping up with my "practice", which is to say to start with a morning meditation, to make sure I keep focused on the outcomes that I want, and to align with higher vibration. I realize it is much harder to do that with Johnnie in the house but this morning I have no such excuse. And STILL I find myself scrambling to go to McDonald's at 9 AM simply to get myself some breakfast because by then I didn't feel like making anything. Heck I didn't feel like taking a shower or even changing clothes. I guess I'm taking somewhat of a day off today aren't I? Which isn't really such a bad idea considering it didn't turn out to be such a busy week. I am grappling with thoughts that I am not busy enough, which is coming purely from my ego and from a place that is an old imprint of "not-enoughness". Truth is I am running my department at a fairly high level already and even with the news this week that my CEO Barbara Hines is retiring at the end of the year, I simply poof away thoughts of what is to happen when she does. That question of course is squarely dependent on who takes her place. I am not really all that worried because I have gone through all kinds of bosses and I'm sure whoever ends up in charge won't make any changes. I also realize that today is payday and that I am now making $160,000 a year which is to say I feel like I have to justify being paid as high as that every single day I'm working. But haven't I already proven time and again that I am worth that if not more? <Whenever I have thoughts like these I think it's time to play that I PROVIDE MASSIVE VALUE affirmation I made myself>  Anyway to be candid, the biggest work thing I did today was to participate in the FRB Birthday party. Another last day for one of our employees... Henry from HR who, in my opinion, helped stabilize his own department on a team that has one of the highest attrition rates in our company. And he didn't even have a supervisory position. I guess it's just his turn to grow, just like Victor's was on my team a year ago. Anyway we did our games and I won quite a lot of the Halloween word scrambles. We sang our Happy Birthdays and generally I thought we had fun. Unlike last month, the management team participated this month which is always a good thing I think. And they pointedly wanted to increase these team activities. THOSE are a must in order to at least keep us connected. And so meeting over by 3, time to go on to Friday stuff... I'm in line at Whole Foods getting groceries. Friday stuff.

And so by 5 PM I was focused on getting my steps and exercises in. Not that it was all that urgent considering I had already gotten my benchmarks for active minutes AND cardio minutes last night. Yep, I got my 7 day benchmarks in IN 4 days.  Even I am impressed with myself. And really all I wanted to do was keep myself busy and distracted so I don't get tempted to watch the Lakers-Heat Game 2 of the NBA Finals. I tried to keep away from the news knowing full well Trump stuff dominated it, I mean what would you expect when the President contracts a deadly virus? Even one he refused to acknowledge. Talk about karma and irony right? I walked around the Whole Foods neighborhood and took a nice pic of a sun that was ready to set. That would be my M&M moment today I guess. For dinner I barbecued some of that Whole Foods Italian sausage, the same kind I used to do for Johnnie and I on Tuesday nights. That has come and gone I think, replaced by Panda Express. Maybe I should try to resurrect it maybe for just a week, knowing full well Johnnie cycles everything.  By hanging around the barbecue area in my apartment I was able to catch up on my steps. I mean I was at less than 1000 when I finished the FRB birthday meeting. That's how much time I spent on the couch today. All day. And that's ok don't get me wrong, but in the end the routine of the steps had far stronger a mental pull. I was already mostly done by the time the ESPN news notification dinged on my iPad. The Laker game was over. They had won, leading the entire game. YES!! Up 2-0 in the championship series. NOW I can smell championship. It is going to be practically impossible to beat LeBron and AD 4 out of the next 5 games. After all, AD had himself a MONSTER game, the kind of game legends are made of. So of course I had to spend the bulk of the evening watching Laker postgame. I knew I had to be at Lisa's early tomorrow morning, after all she IS working. Didn't stop me from watching Netflix, recycling "the Last Kingdom". I was just trying to quiet my mind at that point. I had been on R&R mode all day. And tomorrow, I will have Johnnie for most of the day.