A Visit to the Past

So today I was still giddy over a very satisfying Laker win yesterday. So much so I watched all the morning sports talk shows before even going to work. And then listened to sports talk radio on the way to work. I was relishing the win. Even went right up to the cafeteria so I could gloat with Mark the cook who made me breakfast. There were other things going on of course. The whole coronavirus thing is now right smack in your face as you see gloves and Purell hand sanitizers all around, and all the utensils wrapped in plastic. Sigh. And later on of course I would get the news that our own office is moving up a LEVEL with precaution protocols. To me they were merely distractions and another chance to contribute while I simply do my job. The big deal today of course was pick-up day for Johnnie and today Lisa and I actually gave him the option of watching his mom play soccer. He mentioned it yesterday that he liked the older field with the playground and so I was happy to take him there tonight for a bit. Maybe it would take my mind off the coronavirus stuff. And for sure I'd be able to log some steps in at the playground and merely walking around the field. How many times did i walk around this field to get steps in back in the day?  I hadn't really thought about this field much since Lisa and I had split. This team did not leave me with a good memory considering the contentious stuff that happened after the playoff game the team last lost the last time I was here. I was so emotionally invested in this team but not actually part of the team. That was now a couple of years ago. I stopped watching them since then and today I'm merely visiting. It was good to see familiar faces. Chris Garcia. Jen Garcia. Jun. They seemed glad to see me. Jessica T didn't acknowledge me, nor did Ronnie. It was Ronnie that I had some emotional words with that last time and I don't blame any of them for avoiding me or just acting like I wasn't there. I'm just a visitor today. In fact right here right now I can't believe how much I invested myself emotionally in one of Lisa's activities all that time ago. I kind of feel dumb about it now.  It had  absolutely nothing to do with me. But I merely wanted to support her. Just like her dental practice. And like her dental practice, I started involving myself in everything. I thought that's what teammates do. Oh well... moot point since we're not a team now. Johnnie had fun playing in the playground. It's been a couple of years since he last saw the team too. Can't believe he was just a baby when we first started bringing him around to this field. One thing I'm sure of is that I feel like I don't belong here anymore and that's ok. Like I said I'm just visiting. And it's ok to feel good feelings too. I remember coming to the championship game here when Lisa went to France instead just to be part of it. And celebrate with them after the game. I felt like a part of it all then. Not anymore. Johnnie and I took off at halftime. Back to the Monday routine. Frozen 2 songs. A Happy Meal. An early night. It was good to visit the past and we'll just leave it at that. And it's also ok for the past to say "thank you for your visit" and then just wave goodbye on the way back. "Bye Mom" Johnnie yelled as we got going. He wanted to take off too. It was time to go.