Not Exactly A Happy Valentine's
So on the one hand, it's Valentine's Day, love is supposedly in the air... at least for those that aren't recently divorced single dads heh heh. For today I'm simply living vicariously through Johnnie who is very much into the festivity of Valentine's events. I'm not seeing him today specifically but all week they've been sort of celebrating. The kids have been sending Valentine's cards to each other [I posted the one Johnnie got] and last night Johnnie had spent the evening making cards out for everyone in his class. Awww. I learned about this via a report from Lisa who called me right after she dropped Johnnie off at school this morning. I hadn't left for work yet but I did appreciate that she called to talk to me. She of course was the last Valentine I've had but today I preferred to treat as just another day, at least with her. This way I can keep negative emotions out of it. I can simply appreciate that she called and we got to talk and catch up some. I have no idea what she's doing for Valentine's Day and really it's none of my business. As I said I'm keeping a very safe distance between myself and that aspect of her life. I still miss taking the time and effort to give a rose to all of her staff on this day which I used to do for years. It made me feel good to make them feel good. Now that part of the past is just that... the past. And a casualty of our divorce. And that's ok. I can still wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day. Albeit silently. As I did with Lisa when we hung up. Silently. I actually dreaded going to work today. That's because today is LAY-OFF day. 6 people in the office are getting laid off this morning and that is never easy and that always feels like crap, even to those of us that aren't getting laid off. I, of course, am no stranger to that feeling as I myself remember that day when I got laid off from USC Stevens. Me and a whole bunch of others. Of course that led directly to me being here at QueensCare so it wasn't like it actually affected me all that negatively at all. In fact I ended up getting double paid for 3 months! Allowed me to save up some portion of the down payment to the Maplewood house. But let's not go there lest I feel any more negative emotions LOL. Anyway back to today and the here and now. I walked in to my office and I already walked past a couple of people on their way to the elevator with a box of their stuff. And it's not even 9:30 AM yet. Not going to be a happy day. As it was Eloisa and Chad made an announcement at mid-morning as soon as the last of the 6 had left, which by the way included a couple of managers. I've been around long enough and with many organizations to know that these things are all about choice really. Eloisa talked about hard choices but it seemed to me they're letting go of those people that were just hired less than a year ago. Like maybe we shouldn't have opened those positions in the first place. Oh well, we made it through the morning. I chose to have lunch alone because admittedly, I'm feeling bummed about the whole thing. More so I think because I'm having a memory reaction to the past. Anyway I chose to take a walk after lunch. Made it to the bank to get some money out. Went to Supercuts to get a haircut. Enjoyed the sun in my face. And then at 3 PM it was time to clean the fridge. It is the turn of I.S. this week and I decided I'd do it myself. It would keep my mind off of stuff anyway. And so I cleaned that thing to Lisa specs. Scrubbed all the surfaces, threw out all the expired stuff, probably cleaned the fridge better than it had been cleaned in months. And then before i knew it it was already 5 PM and time to go home. I had nothing to come home to of course, no plans, no nothing but I just wanted a quiet Netflix night anyway. But everyone else sure did. I hadn't seen traffic like that downtown in a while, not to go home to the Westside anyway. I didn't get home until almost 6 PM there was so much traffic. And when i did even going down Sawtelle to my apartment didn't turn out to be easy. Anyway I made myself some of that Japanese food from Marukai (silver noodles, beef bowl) for my nice and quiet Valentine's night dinner alone LOL. Walked around to finish my 11,000 steps. And watched Star Trek Picard Episode 4. Later on I would get a text from Lisa with a pic from Johnnie wishing me Valentine's Day. But by then I was already asleep. This is a 3-day weekend after all and I, for one, look forward to it.
So on the one hand, it's Valentine's Day, love is supposedly in the air... at least for those that aren't recently divorced single dads heh heh. For today I'm simply living vicariously through Johnnie who is very much into the festivity of Valentine's events. I'm not seeing him today specifically but all week they've been sort of celebrating. The kids have been sending Valentine's cards to each other [I posted the one Johnnie got] and last night Johnnie had spent the evening making cards out for everyone in his class. Awww. I learned about this via a report from Lisa who called me right after she dropped Johnnie off at school this morning. I hadn't left for work yet but I did appreciate that she called to talk to me. She of course was the last Valentine I've had but today I preferred to treat as just another day, at least with her. This way I can keep negative emotions out of it. I can simply appreciate that she called and we got to talk and catch up some. I have no idea what she's doing for Valentine's Day and really it's none of my business. As I said I'm keeping a very safe distance between myself and that aspect of her life. I still miss taking the time and effort to give a rose to all of her staff on this day which I used to do for years. It made me feel good to make them feel good. Now that part of the past is just that... the past. And a casualty of our divorce. And that's ok. I can still wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day. Albeit silently. As I did with Lisa when we hung up. Silently. I actually dreaded going to work today. That's because today is LAY-OFF day. 6 people in the office are getting laid off this morning and that is never easy and that always feels like crap, even to those of us that aren't getting laid off. I, of course, am no stranger to that feeling as I myself remember that day when I got laid off from USC Stevens. Me and a whole bunch of others. Of course that led directly to me being here at QueensCare so it wasn't like it actually affected me all that negatively at all. In fact I ended up getting double paid for 3 months! Allowed me to save up some portion of the down payment to the Maplewood house. But let's not go there lest I feel any more negative emotions LOL. Anyway back to today and the here and now. I walked in to my office and I already walked past a couple of people on their way to the elevator with a box of their stuff. And it's not even 9:30 AM yet. Not going to be a happy day. As it was Eloisa and Chad made an announcement at mid-morning as soon as the last of the 6 had left, which by the way included a couple of managers. I've been around long enough and with many organizations to know that these things are all about choice really. Eloisa talked about hard choices but it seemed to me they're letting go of those people that were just hired less than a year ago. Like maybe we shouldn't have opened those positions in the first place. Oh well, we made it through the morning. I chose to have lunch alone because admittedly, I'm feeling bummed about the whole thing. More so I think because I'm having a memory reaction to the past. Anyway I chose to take a walk after lunch. Made it to the bank to get some money out. Went to Supercuts to get a haircut. Enjoyed the sun in my face. And then at 3 PM it was time to clean the fridge. It is the turn of I.S. this week and I decided I'd do it myself. It would keep my mind off of stuff anyway. And so I cleaned that thing to Lisa specs. Scrubbed all the surfaces, threw out all the expired stuff, probably cleaned the fridge better than it had been cleaned in months. And then before i knew it it was already 5 PM and time to go home. I had nothing to come home to of course, no plans, no nothing but I just wanted a quiet Netflix night anyway. But everyone else sure did. I hadn't seen traffic like that downtown in a while, not to go home to the Westside anyway. I didn't get home until almost 6 PM there was so much traffic. And when i did even going down Sawtelle to my apartment didn't turn out to be easy. Anyway I made myself some of that Japanese food from Marukai (silver noodles, beef bowl) for my nice and quiet Valentine's night dinner alone LOL. Walked around to finish my 11,000 steps. And watched Star Trek Picard Episode 4. Later on I would get a text from Lisa with a pic from Johnnie wishing me Valentine's Day. But by then I was already asleep. This is a 3-day weekend after all and I, for one, look forward to it.
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